I knew almost immediately. Hazel was watching a video of a bunch of kittens hopping gleefully about, and the emotional reaction I had to this silly clip that I've seen about a billion times before simply didn't leave any room for doubt. I needed to be preparing for the arrival of a brand new bundle of joy.
That was weeks before we were even in the testable zone of a pregnancy...and left me plenty of time to panic the hardcore panic I didn't know I had in me when it came to the subject of babies. You see, I had JUST made the decision that I was happy - really happy - with our family as it was, and I felt my life going in a strong, awesome direction, and I had just let the idea of having another child go, seeing the dangers - both physical and psychological - outweighing the possibility of another baby by just enough to end the 'baby' chapter of my life behind me as Hazel toddled away from her own babyhood. To whit, I actually know the date of conception this time, which I haven't before, and wouldn't you know, it was the EXACT DAY that I had consciously made the decision that I didn't want any more biological children? I guess the universe disagreed with my personal decree, and evidently this baby was Meant to Be.
Which is why, though panic I did, I am thrilled about this baby. I went through a few very intense days of emotional roller coaster riding, feeling like this just can't happen, being angry, confused, scared...but I came through it. We know now, after two such adventures of welcoming new children into our lives, that each individual child comes with so much new joy and fulfillment and growth, and an entirely new prespective on life...I have no illusions that this will be easy, but we are confident that this child will bring us just as much happiness in his or her own way, and that whatever hardships we have to endure will be well worth it. I cannot wait to meet our new little one, who will make his or her debut sometime this fall while we're in DC.
Cadence and Hazel are thrilled to welcome a new baby into the family. They are such amazingly good kids (and awesome helpers, I might add!). This kid is lucky to have two such loving, capable, and no doubt doting Jiejies in his or her life.
Welcome to this crazy mix, Baby Yu #3!!!